Got this in an email from a friend. Before you think I'm going all "preacher" on you..read it. I just thought it was insightful as to things we take for granted.
Thank you, God!
FOR THE WIFE
WHO SAYS IT'S HOT DOGS TONIGHT,
BECAUSE SHE IS HOME WITH ME,
AND NOT OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE.
FOR THE HUSBAND
WHO IS ON THE SOFA
BEING A COUCH POTATO,
BECAUSE HE IS HOME WITH ME
AND NOT OUT AT THE BARS.
FOR THE TEENAGER
WHO IS COMPLAINING ABOUT DOING DISHES
BECAUSE IT MEANS HE/SHE IS AT HOME,
NOT ON THE STREETS.
FOR THE TAXES I PAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM EMPLOYED.
FOR THE MESS TO CLEAN AFTER A PARTY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
BEEN SURROUNDED BY FRIENDS.
FOR THE CLOTHES THAT FIT A LITTLE TOO SNUG
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE ENOUGH TO EAT.
FOR MY SHADOW THAT WATCHES ME WORK
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM OUT IN THE SUNSHINE
FOR A LAWN THAT NEEDS MOWING,
WINDOWS THAT NEED CLEANING,
AND GUTTERS THAT NEED FIXING
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE A HOME.
FOR ALL THE COMPLAINING
I HEAR ABOUT THE GOVERNMENT
BECAUSE IT MEANS
WE HAVE FREEDOM OF SPEECH..
FOR THE PARKING SPOT
I FIND AT THE FAR END OF THE PARKING LOT
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM CAPABLE OF WALKING
AND I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH TRANSPORTATION.
FOR MY HUGE HEATING BILL
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I AM WARM.
FOR THE LADY BEHIND ME IN CHURCH
WHO SINGS OFF KEY BECAUSE IT MEANS
I CAN HEAR.
FOR THE PILE OF LAUNDRY AND IRONING
BECAUSE IT MEANS
I HAVE CLOTHES TO WEAR.
FOR WEARINESS AND ACHING MUSCLES
AT THE END OF THE DAY
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE BEEN
CAPABLE OF WORKING HARD.
FOR THE ALARM THAT GOES OFF
IN THE EARLY MORNING HOURS
BECAUSE IT MEANS I AM ALIVE.
AND FINALLY, FOR TOO MUCH E-MAIL
BECAUSE IT MEANS I HAVE
FRIENDS WHO ARE THINKING OF ME.
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
Friday, January 13, 2006
Engineering Laughs
An old and very dear friend of mine Amrut sent this to me, funny as heck.....
Engineering College : Place where you're punished for getting good HSC marks.
Senior : Guy who got ragged as junior and wanna get some payback...
Fresher : Guy who has to ask where the canteen is...
Really Dumb Fresher : Guy who asks a senior where the canteen is.
Really Really Dumb fresher : Guy who follows the senior to the canteen.
Ragging : The unfortunate fate of the previous idiot.
Evasive action : Watch the juniors when any seniors come nearby. (No one runs faster than a fresher. NO ONE.)
Lectures : Waste of time. Physical presence is a must...only meant for sleeping, completing assignments & general TP
Tuitions : What you take when you don't waste enough time....
Professor : Person paid to put students to sleep.
Vernacular Prof : Unusual variant of previous individual who comes packaged with his own brand of English ("Now you check me our journal." "You Out get from class." "Are you Understand, Beta?" )
Practicals : 60 to 90 minutes in which we watch the girls do our experiment, and usually destroy a considerable array of lab equipment.
Hopeless Practical : The practical in which there are no girls in our group simply look blankly at each other, fiddle with the equipment, and finally copy the readings.(from the girls of course...).
The Truth about exams....
Irony : The guy who copied your entire paper passes and you flunk.
Critical Calculation : Summing up the marks you attempted worth in the exam...
Re-verification : A cruel joke. (results of which come after you give the KT exam).
An engineer's 10 engineering commandments of Life
1. Thou shall study only during the preparatory leave.
2. Thou shall never write thy assignments thyself.
3. Thou shall begin writing thy journals only on the morning of submission.
4. Thou shall treat all marks above 40 as bonus.
5. Thou shall have at least 70 per cent attendance in the canteen.
6. Thou shall pass GRACEfully.
7. Thou shall always be an OUTstanding student.
8. Thou shall give thy attendance without being present...PROXY is a MUST
9. If thou can't convince them , confuse them.
10. Thou shall start every sentence with a four-lettered word.
The Years of Engineering
F.E. Fond of Engineering
S.E . Sick Of Engineering
T.E. Tired of Engineering
B.E. Balls to Engineering
Engineers Anthem:
Hum Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear Ek Din, OH-HO, Mann me hai vishwas, pura hai vishwas, hum honge all clear ek din
Top two Engineering Rumors:
'Did you hear the results are being put up today at 5:30pm'
'Did you hear the exams are postponed by two weeks, its been put up at VJTI'
The most dreaded acronym for Engineers: ATKT (After Trying Keep Trying)
The most important criteria while selecting an engineering college:
Girl to Boy ratio (if more than 0 .025% then that college is engineers dream come true)
Engineers at work:
Assignments solved by one and then carrying out mass transfer operations throughout the class
The most important machine for Engineers: Xerox Machine (Without which assignment completion wouldn't be possible)
The most important table in an Engineer's House: The glass table (to carry out GT operations, during Night Duty.)
The only queue an Engineer is familiar with: Submission Queue
An Engineer's favourite watch: Bird Watch !
Common Engineering Dialogues after a paper:
'What is this yaar, more than 70% of the paper was out of the syllabus'
'This was the worst paper set in the entire engineering history'
'I am failing....I got screwed royally'
Feeling after Completing Engineering: Survived Engineering !!!!!!!!!!!
Engineering College : Place where you're punished for getting good HSC marks.
Senior : Guy who got ragged as junior and wanna get some payback...
Fresher : Guy who has to ask where the canteen is...
Really Dumb Fresher : Guy who asks a senior where the canteen is.
Really Really Dumb fresher : Guy who follows the senior to the canteen.
Ragging : The unfortunate fate of the previous idiot.
Evasive action : Watch the juniors when any seniors come nearby. (No one runs faster than a fresher. NO ONE.)
Lectures : Waste of time. Physical presence is a must...only meant for sleeping, completing assignments & general TP
Tuitions : What you take when you don't waste enough time....
Professor : Person paid to put students to sleep.
Vernacular Prof : Unusual variant of previous individual who comes packaged with his own brand of English ("Now you check me our journal." "You Out get from class." "Are you Understand, Beta?" )
Practicals : 60 to 90 minutes in which we watch the girls do our experiment, and usually destroy a considerable array of lab equipment.
Hopeless Practical : The practical in which there are no girls in our group simply look blankly at each other, fiddle with the equipment, and finally copy the readings.(from the girls of course...).
The Truth about exams....
Irony : The guy who copied your entire paper passes and you flunk.
Critical Calculation : Summing up the marks you attempted worth in the exam...
Re-verification : A cruel joke. (results of which come after you give the KT exam).
An engineer's 10 engineering commandments of Life
1. Thou shall study only during the preparatory leave.
2. Thou shall never write thy assignments thyself.
3. Thou shall begin writing thy journals only on the morning of submission.
4. Thou shall treat all marks above 40 as bonus.
5. Thou shall have at least 70 per cent attendance in the canteen.
6. Thou shall pass GRACEfully.
7. Thou shall always be an OUTstanding student.
8. Thou shall give thy attendance without being present...PROXY is a MUST
9. If thou can't convince them , confuse them.
10. Thou shall start every sentence with a four-lettered word.
The Years of Engineering
F.E. Fond of Engineering
S.E . Sick Of Engineering
T.E. Tired of Engineering
B.E. Balls to Engineering
Engineers Anthem:
Hum Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear, Honge All Clear Ek Din, OH-HO, Mann me hai vishwas, pura hai vishwas, hum honge all clear ek din
Top two Engineering Rumors:
'Did you hear the results are being put up today at 5:30pm'
'Did you hear the exams are postponed by two weeks, its been put up at VJTI'
The most dreaded acronym for Engineers: ATKT (After Trying Keep Trying)
The most important criteria while selecting an engineering college:
Girl to Boy ratio (if more than 0 .025% then that college is engineers dream come true)
Engineers at work:
Assignments solved by one and then carrying out mass transfer operations throughout the class
The most important machine for Engineers: Xerox Machine (Without which assignment completion wouldn't be possible)
The most important table in an Engineer's House: The glass table (to carry out GT operations, during Night Duty.)
The only queue an Engineer is familiar with: Submission Queue
An Engineer's favourite watch: Bird Watch !
Common Engineering Dialogues after a paper:
'What is this yaar, more than 70% of the paper was out of the syllabus'
'This was the worst paper set in the entire engineering history'
'I am failing....I got screwed royally'
Feeling after Completing Engineering: Survived Engineering !!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Happy New Year
Ah, the first of the year, the day we make resolutions, the day we start a new leaf over...the day before the days we go back to ourselves from the day before today :)
Happy new year all....Blessings and Joy to you and yours for the success and joy that your heart desires...!!!
Happy new year all....Blessings and Joy to you and yours for the success and joy that your heart desires...!!!
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