Went over to Padma's place and had a really really good time with her folks. Her mom / dad were super hospitable to mum and me (what with mums craziness and eccentricities) and we really felt welcome there. i cannot even begin to say how greatful i am for everything.
one thing i really wanted to write about is that i feel so connected to Dida. Shes this bubbly old woman who's led her life losing her husband at a very young age an then giving up all meats (not out of choice -- but for tradition). Her smile absolutely captivated me when I met her a couple of year ago, but this time around I had the opportunity to talk to her, laugh with her, eat the cloves that she kept giving me and finally put an arm around her. Shes 80+ something years old and I can say that I absolutely love her for who she is and the affections that she represents for me.
As i was sitting in the goa airport with her, she spoke to me in broken hindi about coming back to see her within the next yr while I tried to convince her to come visit padma and me in the USofA. I hope to see her before she sees me in India..I was very sad when she started to cry and tell me that shes going to be alone once Padma and I leave, i really treat her and think of her as my family and my own blood. Its been only a day and I miss her laughter terribly. Life sucks when you cannot be around those you care about
Sunday, December 24, 2006
Saturday, December 23, 2006
India - en Route --
okay, this will get posted a little later than the actual write date, but, i thought that I would share some information as i go along on my trip back to india.
Firstly, I detest flying by United airlines..it makes me feel like James Bond. My flight from ORD-PHL was delayed on Dec 15 from 4 pm CST to 11 pm CST. Then the flight sat on the runway for 3 hrs and turned back to the terminal. The reason: Fog in philadelphia and that the flight crew was tired. Did anyone think about the weary passenger who had actually paid for this ordeal? Anyway, they rebooked me on the next days flight back to philly at 9.30 am. Now, note that I had a plane from JFK - Abu Dhabi to catch at 10 pm that same night. My flight from Chicago was sposed to arrive in Phila around 12.30 pm, giving me enough time to extend my apartment lease, pack, get a haircut, do some last minute shopping for mum and any final closeouts that required my attention, including paying of all out household bills (credit cards, utilities etc).
While holding my breath, i realized that the plane was (again) going to be 3 hrs late, so instead of arriving at 12.30 pm, i reached home at 3.30 pm, with very little time to get my shit together. Thank you United.
Run home with a one way rental from Avis, pick, pack and rush to the CVS pharmacy to pick up my prescription meds, go to Dons to attempt to get a haircut but alas, he has a long line and wont get to me until an hour later (which of course given my schedule means no haircut).
5.30 pm on Dec 16th: Grab my bags and rush ot the car, now im wearing jeans and a sweatshirt with sneakers. I've ditched my formal attire on the living room couch and I know wifey is gonna be mad at me for messing the house up in my hurry to leave town. That said, I do the run from Philly to JFK in record time (I'm sure the cops recorded my speed at around 95mph along the turnpike) and manage to (barely) make my flight to abu dhabi. Turns out I have middle seats for the 14 hr flight. *sigh*
I sit down to be surrounded by two individuals, one pakistani kid who grew up in nyc and the other a bangladeshi kid who grew up in Abu Dhabi. We actually made some super conversation and that really shortened the journey. The Pakistani kid and myself had a 6 hr layover in Abu Dhabi, so we managed to grab a beer together at the airport. He's a really good kid and can draw caricatures really well.I wish him luck and success in his future.
The next flight from Abu Dhabi to Bombay is uneventful, i end up in an exit row facing the flight attendants seat. She's a woman from Lebanon and we chat for a bit during those brief moments that they actually get to sit down. Turns out shes exhausted with her schedule as well and can't wait to get back to Beirut to see her mom / dad and family. I know that feeling.
7.30 AM IST: Bombay: Walk out of the Bombay airport with practically no luggage (because I only had a roll on bag and laptop bag). I have few hours to kill before heading on the Indian airlines flight at 1 pm to goa to see my wife and mom. Stop by Bandra(W) to see my best friends mom and have a quick breakfast with them. tried to call my sis-in-law for breakfast but shes not picking up her cell phone -- turns out later that she doesnt accept calls from "unknown" numbers...sheesh.
So i make it out to goa finally and mom / wife are waiting outside dabolim aiport. Wifes dad is kind enough to give me his family car to get around and that makes life so much easier getting around goa.
India, I'm back. I don't miss you very often, but when I come back I realize that you are the void that fulfils my life.
Firstly, I detest flying by United airlines..it makes me feel like James Bond. My flight from ORD-PHL was delayed on Dec 15 from 4 pm CST to 11 pm CST. Then the flight sat on the runway for 3 hrs and turned back to the terminal. The reason: Fog in philadelphia and that the flight crew was tired. Did anyone think about the weary passenger who had actually paid for this ordeal? Anyway, they rebooked me on the next days flight back to philly at 9.30 am. Now, note that I had a plane from JFK - Abu Dhabi to catch at 10 pm that same night. My flight from Chicago was sposed to arrive in Phila around 12.30 pm, giving me enough time to extend my apartment lease, pack, get a haircut, do some last minute shopping for mum and any final closeouts that required my attention, including paying of all out household bills (credit cards, utilities etc).
While holding my breath, i realized that the plane was (again) going to be 3 hrs late, so instead of arriving at 12.30 pm, i reached home at 3.30 pm, with very little time to get my shit together. Thank you United.
Run home with a one way rental from Avis, pick, pack and rush to the CVS pharmacy to pick up my prescription meds, go to Dons to attempt to get a haircut but alas, he has a long line and wont get to me until an hour later (which of course given my schedule means no haircut).
5.30 pm on Dec 16th: Grab my bags and rush ot the car, now im wearing jeans and a sweatshirt with sneakers. I've ditched my formal attire on the living room couch and I know wifey is gonna be mad at me for messing the house up in my hurry to leave town. That said, I do the run from Philly to JFK in record time (I'm sure the cops recorded my speed at around 95mph along the turnpike) and manage to (barely) make my flight to abu dhabi. Turns out I have middle seats for the 14 hr flight. *sigh*
I sit down to be surrounded by two individuals, one pakistani kid who grew up in nyc and the other a bangladeshi kid who grew up in Abu Dhabi. We actually made some super conversation and that really shortened the journey. The Pakistani kid and myself had a 6 hr layover in Abu Dhabi, so we managed to grab a beer together at the airport. He's a really good kid and can draw caricatures really well.I wish him luck and success in his future.
The next flight from Abu Dhabi to Bombay is uneventful, i end up in an exit row facing the flight attendants seat. She's a woman from Lebanon and we chat for a bit during those brief moments that they actually get to sit down. Turns out shes exhausted with her schedule as well and can't wait to get back to Beirut to see her mom / dad and family. I know that feeling.
7.30 AM IST: Bombay: Walk out of the Bombay airport with practically no luggage (because I only had a roll on bag and laptop bag). I have few hours to kill before heading on the Indian airlines flight at 1 pm to goa to see my wife and mom. Stop by Bandra(W) to see my best friends mom and have a quick breakfast with them. tried to call my sis-in-law for breakfast but shes not picking up her cell phone -- turns out later that she doesnt accept calls from "unknown" numbers...sheesh.
So i make it out to goa finally and mom / wife are waiting outside dabolim aiport. Wifes dad is kind enough to give me his family car to get around and that makes life so much easier getting around goa.
India, I'm back. I don't miss you very often, but when I come back I realize that you are the void that fulfils my life.
Tuesday, December 12, 2006
Plans change, everything changes
it turns out on impulse that I have decided to go to india. so now, im flying back from chicago to philly in the early hours of friday morning (returning from work), then have to pack my crap and leave for nyc for a bunch of meetings in teh afternoon. get this, i have to wear a suit to some of these meetings.
well, thank god for a buddy called ryan. im gonna leave my clothes there, switch to jeans and a t (and a sweatshirt), catch a cab to JFK and then head down to abu-dhabi - bombay - goa :)
its going to be 30+ hours of travel (and 20+ hrs in a plane) but getting to see my wife and mom is all going to be so worth it.
Merry christmas y'all, we'll see you in the next year....
well, thank god for a buddy called ryan. im gonna leave my clothes there, switch to jeans and a t (and a sweatshirt), catch a cab to JFK and then head down to abu-dhabi - bombay - goa :)
its going to be 30+ hours of travel (and 20+ hrs in a plane) but getting to see my wife and mom is all going to be so worth it.
Merry christmas y'all, we'll see you in the next year....
Sunday, December 10, 2006
Eagles / Giants
Brian called me up yesterday with some season tickets on sale for the Eagles Giants game this sunday. Really good seats at $75 face value a pop. Etims coming down friday to hang in philly with Nilesh and probably Chin too..so once i'm done here, I head up to Giants stadium on sunday (18th) to watch Jeff Garcia try and bring the birds back. Gonna wear my McNabb No.5 Jersey tho, i know brian feels i'm gonna get me ass kicked in at the stadium ... we'll see.. I'm an Eagles fan, i'm not a pussy to not wear my teams colors......and yes these colors DO run (in case you put bleach on them)
Saturday, December 09, 2006
Watching the world pass me
Watching the world pass me ... in slow motion
My mind is wandering,
across the landscape of memories
ones that I have shared and lived
and ones, that i know i will experience
I am on top of the world,
and then down below,
brightness hits my eyes
darkness, here we go
I imagine things that may come
and those im not sure did
I am confused with the reality of it all
confused, as to why I am here
This is not alcohol, this is not another high,
its my mind, and my feelings
just like the evening sun
its gone with the days gone by
My mind is wandering,
across the landscape of memories
ones that I have shared and lived
and ones, that i know i will experience
I am on top of the world,
and then down below,
brightness hits my eyes
darkness, here we go
I imagine things that may come
and those im not sure did
I am confused with the reality of it all
confused, as to why I am here
This is not alcohol, this is not another high,
its my mind, and my feelings
just like the evening sun
its gone with the days gone by
Chicago, the apartment and the disappointments
Well, i'm almost done with Chicago and god knows I can't be happier. What with the single digit temperatures and icy cold winds (at 20 below), it was getting a little too "down-low" for my tropical ass.
My apartment woes just began last week with a call from my realtor. Turns out that the leasor/landlord now decided to sell the place because "he needs the money". My take is FUCK YES, but why not do it before you put it on the market as a rental, you stupid fucking time-wasting moron? That would allow us to focus on other locations and not stop searching when we thought we had found the one we liked.
Well I wish them luck, actually i dont. I hope they find a buyer who wastes their time like they did ours .. grrr!!!
My apartment woes just began last week with a call from my realtor. Turns out that the leasor/landlord now decided to sell the place because "he needs the money". My take is FUCK YES, but why not do it before you put it on the market as a rental, you stupid fucking time-wasting moron? That would allow us to focus on other locations and not stop searching when we thought we had found the one we liked.
Well I wish them luck, actually i dont. I hope they find a buyer who wastes their time like they did ours .. grrr!!!
Wednesday, December 06, 2006
More thoughts, this goes out to my wife
I realized that I haven't been connected to my wife for a while now given her travel schedule and work on my side. Something for her to chew on:
You I will always love,
even after the day I am gone,
my one emotion I'll leave behind,
Until again we are one.
My feelings my heart,
will always be in your hands,
thats never going to change
that road has no end.
Your smile I do live for,
your touch and your happiness,
every motion that you go through,
paramount to my existance.
So if you ever see,
those cloudy skies above
just remember that throught thick and thin, through present and past,
you will always have my love.
You I will always love,
even after the day I am gone,
my one emotion I'll leave behind,
Until again we are one.
My feelings my heart,
will always be in your hands,
thats never going to change
that road has no end.
Your smile I do live for,
your touch and your happiness,
every motion that you go through,
paramount to my existance.
So if you ever see,
those cloudy skies above
just remember that throught thick and thin, through present and past,
you will always have my love.
Saturday, November 25, 2006
New Beginnings?
Finally found a new apartment, I know my wife is gonna be thrilled because this was the one apartment that she really really liked. Now for the tough part of moving in as well as signing the lease tomorrow.
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Of Thanksgiving
its the eve of thanksgiving and im sipping a smithwicks listening to some jazz...crummy weather outside but life demands that i go pick up some groceries :)
to all of you with your families and loved ones, have a super happy thanksgiving. to those (like myself) who are away from your families, a happy thanksgiving to you and those that you yearn to be with
to all of you with your families and loved ones, have a super happy thanksgiving. to those (like myself) who are away from your families, a happy thanksgiving to you and those that you yearn to be with
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Another Dali
Picked up another dali lithograph...
Paradise Chant 26 Dante Recovers His Sight (WOODBLOCK ENGRAVED SIGNED).. this is part of the Divine Comedy series
Paradise Chant 26 Dante Recovers His Sight (WOODBLOCK ENGRAVED SIGNED).. this is part of the Divine Comedy series
Monday, November 20, 2006
Poetry for my wife and family
Saudade again, miss my wife and family....
I'm over the hill, on the other side
Staring into the rays of the sun
The night behind me, my fears they hide,
A brand new day has begun.
Looking up to the sky and a new start on life
Would this be my achilles heel
To try and try again, not recognize failure
But to stand up and go the road ahead
I regret that i havent spent more time
With those that i love the best
One of those i cared for is long gone
And i need to work with the rest
I miss you with every beat in my pulse,
I breathe your name in my sleep
You are doing what needs you most,
For that my dear, i cannot fault you deep
I am going to reset, and find my way home
To you mother, sister and you my best friend
We'll be together just like before,
And my sadness will find its end
I'm over the hill, on the other side
Staring into the rays of the sun
The night behind me, my fears they hide,
A brand new day has begun.
Looking up to the sky and a new start on life
Would this be my achilles heel
To try and try again, not recognize failure
But to stand up and go the road ahead
I regret that i havent spent more time
With those that i love the best
One of those i cared for is long gone
And i need to work with the rest
I miss you with every beat in my pulse,
I breathe your name in my sleep
You are doing what needs you most,
For that my dear, i cannot fault you deep
I am going to reset, and find my way home
To you mother, sister and you my best friend
We'll be together just like before,
And my sadness will find its end
Sunday, November 19, 2006
Second last weekend of the semester
Got done with the Fin Acctg test, did quite well actually 26/30, better than the crap i score in the last one.
Ooh, also managed to pick up my first authentic Salvador Dali (pencil signed) Lithograph.. I'm really psyched and can't wait for it to be delivered. It's one of his less surrealistic pieces of art called "Jerusalem Bible", and its pretty. Not exactly expecting the "Persistence of memory" simply because i don't have that kind of money..
Ooh, also managed to pick up my first authentic Salvador Dali (pencil signed) Lithograph.. I'm really psyched and can't wait for it to be delivered. It's one of his less surrealistic pieces of art called "Jerusalem Bible", and its pretty. Not exactly expecting the "Persistence of memory" simply because i don't have that kind of money..
Friday, November 17, 2006
Financial Accounting and then some more
got home in the wee hours of the morning from Chicago. Flights delayed due to crummy weather on the east coast. I think i'm running on overdrive given that i've slept only 4 hrs today. Managed to catch up on my marketing reading (pricing/branding etc) and now am playing catch up on financial accounting. gotta admit i love the subject but each exam throws me into a tizzy :)
ah well, tomorrow is another day ... smoked a nice rocky patel 1990 vintage cigar sitting outside on the deck in the cold, reading...
am wondering if my life has more meaning than just this.. stress and more stress. lack of relaxed weekends. i do miss my partner (my wife) terribly, she's such a treat to have around, a great companion. well, gotta wait until xmas eve till she gets back (or i find my way to goa before that to see her).
am off to joes place in a few to grab dinner with him and study for the test tomm, i know he wants me to just crash over there and leave for class directly in the morning (very nice of him actually)..somehow i just want to sleep in my own bed for a change. i've travelled close to 20k miles in the past 3 weeks, i'm tired, i need a break from my career life (yeah i know i sound like a whiny biach...yeah i know)
ah well, tomorrow is another day ... smoked a nice rocky patel 1990 vintage cigar sitting outside on the deck in the cold, reading...
am wondering if my life has more meaning than just this.. stress and more stress. lack of relaxed weekends. i do miss my partner (my wife) terribly, she's such a treat to have around, a great companion. well, gotta wait until xmas eve till she gets back (or i find my way to goa before that to see her).
am off to joes place in a few to grab dinner with him and study for the test tomm, i know he wants me to just crash over there and leave for class directly in the morning (very nice of him actually)..somehow i just want to sleep in my own bed for a change. i've travelled close to 20k miles in the past 3 weeks, i'm tired, i need a break from my career life (yeah i know i sound like a whiny biach...yeah i know)
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
33 today
Gosh, i turn 33 today. Went to the Ram Brewery to have a quick beer and a crab sandwich. Had the Buttface Amber Ale, was really good actually.
I feel old.....
I feel old.....
Saturday, November 11, 2006
To those taking a turn
Life has its own ups and downs and sometimes people are faced with the really hard decision to bond together or move on. To those that have decided to move on, you know you are making the right decision for yourselves, focus on that light at the end of the tunnel, its a long tunnel, but you will eventually get there...
consider me a well wisher. always!
consider me a well wisher. always!
early am
Woke up with a heavy head, and all these thoughts swirling through it...for once in my life i couldn't understand why.. no emotions were attached besides saudade...and then it struck me, it was about the one painting that always has me thinking....
~ Persistence of memory - To the surrealistic maestro ~
The passage of time, seems like today is yesterday
My memories fade, people i know have gone away
Pictures, stills in the fabric that never rests
Somehow i tend to remember the best
I'm holding hands with you, a compadre, a lover, maybe a friend?
I cannot recall, how did it end?
Separate ways? a fork in our lives
Or was it just life being life, taking over our ties?
Children in a backyard, playing games together,
Now adults with a motive, not wanting one another,
Innocence so lost, and love in between
If it could be undone, it never should have been
Looking forward, into a grey future,
Trying to beat time, and mother nature,
My body starts to fade, memories wane,
Yet, some part of me wants to be that child again.
~ Persistence of memory - To the surrealistic maestro ~
The passage of time, seems like today is yesterday
My memories fade, people i know have gone away
Pictures, stills in the fabric that never rests
Somehow i tend to remember the best
I'm holding hands with you, a compadre, a lover, maybe a friend?
I cannot recall, how did it end?
Separate ways? a fork in our lives
Or was it just life being life, taking over our ties?
Children in a backyard, playing games together,
Now adults with a motive, not wanting one another,
Innocence so lost, and love in between
If it could be undone, it never should have been
Looking forward, into a grey future,
Trying to beat time, and mother nature,
My body starts to fade, memories wane,
Yet, some part of me wants to be that child again.
Friday, November 10, 2006
Evil bloodmire is back
Evil bloodmire has been sitting on me all day today... go away evil bloodmire...
Alone! Once again by myself,
in a room filled with things,
my personal hell,
no feelings, no touch,
Cauterized at the emotional level,
I wonder about my normalcy
I know I know that all is not well
Will that be my fallacy?
My eyes empty, the whites turn dark,
My heart is breaking out of my chest
Evil, even if just for a lark
In my craziness with a smile I will always find a nest
I scheme and devise, nothing goes through me
I see them looking, waiting...
For an opportunity to screw me
over, i'm ahead, im smiling, you don't know it.
Alone! Once again by myself,
in a room filled with things,
my personal hell,
no feelings, no touch,
Cauterized at the emotional level,
I wonder about my normalcy
I know I know that all is not well
Will that be my fallacy?
My eyes empty, the whites turn dark,
My heart is breaking out of my chest
Evil, even if just for a lark
In my craziness with a smile I will always find a nest
I scheme and devise, nothing goes through me
I see them looking, waiting...
For an opportunity to screw me
over, i'm ahead, im smiling, you don't know it.
Sunday, November 05, 2006
Wife leaves town
My wife has left town to help out her ailing father in Goa, India. Gosh, i felt so empty driving back from the airport after I said goodbye to her..shes gone for 30+ days approximately. I guess I realized how much i enjoy having her next to me..we're like partners in crime, buddies..and we find happiness in our companionship.
Awright my dear, here's to a safe trip, and to yr dads speedy recovery. ATBB
Awright my dear, here's to a safe trip, and to yr dads speedy recovery. ATBB
Saturday, November 04, 2006
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